The Mandate: How do know when its time to move on?

Written by The Mandate on . Posted in NY Press Exclusive.


I’ve gone on a couple of dates with a guy, and the chemistry just isn’t there. We sit at dinner and force conversation, or sit awkwardly staring at our plates. Then you get some booze in us (not a lot, mind you) and the conversation flows like nothing else! How do I know if this is worth continuing to pursue, and when is it time to just move on? 

The time is now. Wherever you go, there you are. You’re there. You’re at that time. Move on. I’m a neurotic white Jewish man. Funnel some booze in my mouth and I’m sure I could have a perfectly charming conversation with the Fuhrer. That’s what alcohol does. It makes you loquacious, eases you into insensibly numb attraction. And while you think that you guys are having an intellectually stimulating conversation when your eyes are in the back of your head, I’ll give you the translation of actual events.

Him: “Oh, I love D.H. Lawrence.” I have smooth soft hands, that will fell nice against your skin.

Her: “His prose are poetry.” Why is he talking about D.H. Lawrence? I’m ready to go.

Him: “But enough about that. Let’s get the check.” She’s ready to go.

Her: “I should probably take a cab.” We should go home together.

Him: “I’ll get you one.” We’re going home together.

It’s like a scripted dialogue and you both are the actors. If you’re unable to be sober with another individual for the span of an hour, having a fully linear conversation: THE TIME IS NOW!

If you’re still on the fence about it, find an activity the two of you can do devoid of boozing. Take a walk in Central Park. I’ve found that movement naturally produces conversation. When you’re sitting down looking at the other person, without anything else to do, it’s awkward. It feels forced. Get your feet going, and see if that gets the jabbering going. If you both are doing a whole lot of “scenery watching,” rather than fun talking… THE TIME IS NOW.

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