The Kids Are Alright

Prior to Sunday night’s concert, my only real knowledge of Paul Green’s School of Rock came from Richard Linklater’s movie starring Jack Black. I’ve heard about them playing shows, and have always been interested in seeing the kids play, but not enough to get me out there.

On Friday afternoon I found out that they would be doing a show with Gibby Haynes as their guest instructor. Not only would they be performing songs with Haynes, but the set would be comprised of Butthole Surfers songs.

I never had the chance to catch the Butthole Surfers live, but the things I’ve heard and seen lead me to believe that they were something incredible to see live. A true rock ’n’ roll spectacle. Fire. Explosions. Strippers. Those are three things I would never associate with children—at least in a positive way—so the idea of kiddos and Gibby sharing a stage really sparked my interest. I couldn’t wait to see kids on stage with Gibby Haynes playing “I saw an X-ray of a Girl Passing Gas.” That would be priceless.

Tweens and their parents filled Highline Ballroom—a stark contrast to my usual room full of drunken twentysomething hipsters. Kids walked around with their guitars strapped to them, obviously passionate young musicians—the type who probably sleep with their instrument of choice some nights.

Children Of The Unicorn warmed up the crowd. Ironically, they were kind of like Jack Black’s Tenacious D: totally humorous, but self-aware and serious at the same time. The lead singer was familiar to me because he was also the lead singer for another hilarious local band, Hair Supply. Like any band that’s intentionally cheesy, their set became less humorous over time. Luckily for them, they had a tambourine/cow bell player who’s funny collection of T-shirts made their set more entertaining. (Between songs, he’d take one layer off, to reveal another hilarious shirt—the best being “DOLPHINS ARE GAY SHARKS.”)

After a short wait, Gibby Haynes walked onto the stage with a bunch of kids. I expected to be entertained and impressed by them, but I had no idea how great they’d actually be. But after the first songs, all of my expectations were quickly blown away. These kids were not just talented, they were passionate entertainers who could command the stage. And with Butthole Surfers songs, there was nothing they could do wrong.

With each song, a different set of kids would rotate to the stage to play different instruments. Yes, not only could a young teenager play mind-blowing licks on guitar, but they could also play drums (and in perfect unison with a second drummer). It didn’t matter which gender, they were all incredible. They didn’t just play the odd, experimental songs, they also performed while confidently moving around while Gibby acted as a ringleader, oftentimes standing in awe of his adolescent backing band. The facial expressions he made showed that not even Gibby was ready for some of the truly sensational moments.

As I had hoped, they did play “I saw an X-ray of a girl passing gas,” along with a collection of some of the weirdest songs from the Butthole Surfers’ catalog. As entertaining as the kids were, Haynes was also a riot, explaining at one point that what he has in common with the kids is that he never really emotionally matured past age 11. That made perfect sense.

Deep into the set, Haynes left the stage and Paul Green (founder of School of Rock) came to the stage to announce that Gibby was taking a break to let the kids play five songs that they wrote. Even without the presence of Haynes, the young rockers did nothing but wow the crowd. The songs they played were fully potent with technical skill and plenty of originality and playfulness.

Not long after their guest instructor returned to the stage, he directed them to go totally nuts. Everyone was on the stage breaking out into total mayhem. The kids had been given the cue to act like kids. Instruments were smashed, a pineapple was sent flying and a wall of noise came crashing our way. It was crazy and fun, and not far off from my expectations of an actual Butthole Surfers concert (minus the fire, explosions and strippers). There was even a moment toward the end of the set in which I turned around to see a crowd member with his face planted on the floor, an arm held behind his back. He apparently had gotten out of control and was obviously much too drunk. He also never got to hear “Johnny Smokes,” which he’d repeatedly requested during the show.

After the plug was finally pulled and the stage and venue cleared out, I had to ask myself if it was the best concert I had ever seen. It was certainly comparable to performances I had seen by other great live bands (Flaming Lips, Les Savy Fav, Peelander Z, Arcade Fire…). This is one night I’ll never forget, and will definitely tell my kids about. Not only will I tell my kids about it, but I hope that one day they’ll be able to be part of the School Of Rock, and maybe have someone like Warne Coyne as their guest instructor. And instead of watching someone else’s kid play Butthole Surfers songs, I can see my own kid play guitar on “Psychiatric Explorations of the Fetus with Needles.”

Photos by [Jonny-Leather]