Talking Dirty with The Virgin Suicides' Way-Hot Kirsten Dunst
"Uh-huh," I replied.
"I'll tell her she must have mirrored pants, because I can see myself in them," Mini-Me added.
"Yup," I said.
"I'll tell her that...."
I told Stevie to save it for Kirsten. Of course, when we arrived at the hotel for the interview, Stevie forgot all his lines. It was probably Kirsten's striking blue eyes, low-cut red dress and long shapely legs.
Or maybe it was all the free food and drinks, plus the telephone and television in the bathroom. He seemed really impressed by that.
Kids.
Present for the interview were me, Mini-Me, Kirsten and her personal publicist, Hope Diamond.
Kirsten Dunst: You two look exactly alike. Same hair! Same jackets! Oh my God!
I look nothing like him.
Oh my God! (laughs)
This is Stevie, he's my bass player. We're in a band called Furious George.
Oh, I see! That's cool. I like that name. Are all these stickers for me?
Mini-Me: Uh-huh.
Thank you! That is so awesome! So cool! Wow! The monkey is so cute.
Okay. Let's get down to business. The Virgin Suicides?how was it working with Sofia Coppola?
Ummm...
Isn't Stevie cute?
Adorable.
Who's cuter? Me or him?
Hope Diamond: (whispers to Kirsten) George.
You know what? I like the monkey! (laughs) Furious George the monkey is just so hot. He turns me on.
Okay, so, Sofia...
I love Sofia. She's such a cool chick. I mean like, she's just such a wonderful person to work for and she loved the book The Virgin Suicides. She wanted everything in the movie to be perfect and she had a perfect vision in her head of this film, and she?well, creatively, I don't think anyone would have done the book justice like she did. And when I talked to her and met with her we just hit it off so well together, and it's so nice to work for people who love to do what they do and I think that she has a passion for this.
And she's hot too.
She's very hot. But she's married, honey.
But you're hot too.
Awww. Thank you.
How do you feel about older guys lusting after you?
MM: (laughs)
Oh God! Well, you know, it's part of it. Whatever. If they want to lust...
HD: You can't think about it like that.
I mean, I've done those men's magazines. They always want me to do men's magazines. Like FHN. I did Gear. I might do Bikini next.
How do you feel about guys, well, you know...
Didn't I say that at dinner last night? (laughs) Last night at the dinner table I was like, well, they always want me to do men's magazines and I was like I don't want to be naked and have some guy whacking off to me. But, you know, it's gonna happen I guess whether you like it or not. Also there are Internet pictures with my face and someone else's body. It's not like I can prevent it.
But you're a fantasy. It must be nice to be a fantasy.
You know, guys in my school don't see me like that. They just see me as me.
MM: You're in school?
Yeah, I'm a senior in high school. In L.A. It's a private Catholic school.
Do you wear that little skirt?
Yeah we do. (laughs)
MM: Do you have to wear the knee-high socks too?
I wear the socks. I do the whole thing. I figure, if you're gonna go for the look, you might as well carry it through. Listen to this, we had to wear Catholic school uniforms in this movie, and Jimmy (James Woods) would make such sick comments sometimes.
You looked so hot in your uniform in the movie.
But Jimmy kept making comments. Finally I was like, "Okay Jimmy, I'm 16, okay?"
Britney Spears looks kinda sexy in her Catholic school uniform too!
Yeah, but you know, sometimes it's not so sexy when you're trying so hard. Then it's just like...well, come on!
You were in the movie Dick, right?
MM: (laughs) You said dick.
You played Deep Throat, right?
(laughs) Yes?
Do you know where the term comes from?
Um, yeah. There used to be a porno movie in the 70s called Deep Throat. (nervous laugh)
Do you know?
Of course I know what "deep throat" is!
Do you know what the plot of the movie was?
HD: You know, she's only 17. Come on.
Now I know why I've never been on Howard Stern!
You were in Small Soldiers. How was it working with those little people running around? What with their plastic smiles and all.
It's hard, because nothing is there.
Wait! You mean those little guys weren't on the set?
Nope! You're acting to nothing. These little things are supposed to be crawling up your arm and you react. But it's to nothing. It's really hard. But I think they knew I could do it because I did it with Jumanji. They knew I had experience acting with nothing, and I could make it look real. Which is so challenging as an actor it's unbelievable. It's also a real pain in the ass sometimes too.
Okay, how long did it take you to film The Virgin Suicides?
Like three weeks.
MM: Three weeks?
Yeah, I did it in between the movie Dick and the movie Drop Dead Gorgeous. So we had to do things quickly.
What bands do you love?
I like the new Fiona Apple CD, even though she really depresses me sometimes.
Don't you think she kinda looks like a junkie? Like really really skinny?
She is very skinny, but some people are naturally very skinny... If that's the way she wants to look, let her do her thing. She makes beautiful music. Destiny's Child. I like them also. And Blondie. My mom always wants me to do The Debbie Harry Story.
I know Debbie. She dyed my hair.
That's so cool!
Yeah! Ya know, I'm not really a blond. Neither is Stevie.
Really? Gosh, your hair looks so real. How'd you get your eyebrows dark?
MM: (laughs) It's a trick!
I also listen to Air.
Air?
Air is the band that did the Virgin Suicides soundtrack. They're awesome. They're a French band. They're really good.
Are there any musician guys you have a crush on?
Musician guys? You know, I had a crush on that guy from (laughs), um, Matchbox 20 (more laughs), which is a little embarrassing. You know Rob Thomas?
Of course. [actually has no clue who he is]
I had a mini-crush on him for a while, but I got over that. Then, um, who else is cute, um, I don't really get crushes on band guys. Oh! Maybe Gavin, that guy from Bush. He was cute. But I liked him when I was little.
MM: Uh-huh.
I know it's not your musical tastes.
You guys should go out together. How old are you, Steve?
MM: Nineteen.
You're 19? I thought you were older!
Kirsten, you should give Steve your phone number. You kids should go out.
I live in L.A.!
So? He can fly. Hell, he can walk!
MM: I live in New Jersey. There's nothing to do there.
I'm from New Jersey! From Point Pleasant.
Do you watch The Sopranos?
No. I don't watch The Sopranos. But I do watch Sex and the City. That's my show. I love Sarah Jessica Parker. She's one of my favorites... I met the writer and begged him to write me a part. So maybe you'll see me on there one day.
Do you have a boyfriend back in L.A.?
No. But I have a guy I kinda go out with...no, well, I don't know. Not really.
Have you ever gone steady before?
I never have or had time to, really. A lot of the guys in school are also intimated because of what I do. Also, I'm not around a lot. I'm working. No one really gets to know me. But one guy at school, I'm pretty close with.
Is he cute?
Yeah. But he's like more funny and smart. He's got his own band, is a good snowboarder, and he's got a lot going on.
He's not an actor?
Sometimes ya gotta stay away from those kinda guys. They got those egos going on. You just need to slap them upside the head. (laughs) I'd do better with a director or a writer.
You going to go to college next year?
(laughs) College next year? No. College in the future? I don't know when. But I'm taking my SATs next month because I missed them last month.
I scored an 820 on my SATs.
MM: I scored a 13-something.
Does it really matter? It won't help you out in life. I mean, I know some people who are summa cum laude and I make more money than they do. It's like what you do with yourself, not how far you can get academically. Sure, someone might get straight A's all through school, but then they could end up doing nothing because you have no other talents. School only takes you so far.
You were in Interview with the Vampire. You worked with Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise. Did they try to hit on you during the filming?
No! I was like their little sister in that movie!
HD: She was only 10!
MM: (laughs)
But you know those actor guys.
It's different now. Now guys are starting to get interested. Soon I'm 18. Right now I'm 17, and, like, leave me alone please. I won't have that excuse for much longer.
Where do you see yourself in 10 years?
Hopefully I'll have my own production company and I'll be a well-respected actress doing roles like Gwyneth Paltrow and Cate Blanchett. I mean, for that age range. Hopefully I'll be one of those leading lady chicks.
What are you gonna do when you're 50?
Me? Fifty? Maybe producing and directing. I want to stay in the business.
HD: George, what are you gonna do when you're 50?
I'm almost that now! (everyone laughs) Any pets?
Five cats and a dog.
MM: Five cats? (laughs) That's a lot of?
Ssssh!
What?
MM: Um, wow, five cats, that's a lot.
I love cats. I love animals so much. I'm an animal freak. My one cat is 22.
That's older than you!
HD: The cat is gonna be in Interview next month.
Yeah, and I think I'm licking my cat too. I'm licking its fur. (sticks tongue out)
MM: That's like licking?
Don't say it.
What?
We don't wanna say it.
HD: Kirsten, I can't believe you just said that.
What?
MM: You know.
That is so sick! (laughs) Eeew! I did not mean it like that! Eeew! I was just licking its little head.
You know this is how I'm going to end the interview. Just like that. "I lick my cat."
Oh my God! I hate you. Please don't do that to me!
Okay, I won't.
Really? Thanks!
You're welcome.