PURSE SNATCHER
An unidentified man attacked a 51-year-old woman as she was walking along East 80th Street on Monday and seized her purse. According to the victim, an East 85th Street resident, the man approached her around 11 p.m. and demanded money. He then threw her against a pole and onto the ground as he grabbed her purse, but only took a pack of cigarettes from a small bag within the purse. The thief fled toward Fifth Avenue, and remains at large.

SHOPLIFT FEVER
One shoplifter did not know when to quit on Monday. Workers at a pharmacy on Second Avenue first confronted him outside their store around 4 p.m. after he swiped goods from their store. He argued with the workers, then fled toward East 63rd Street. A witness told the workers that the shoplifter left a shopping bag in a newspaper box on 63rd Street, so the workers went to investigate, and were confronted by the shoplifter, who told them, “That’s my stuff.” The group got into another dispute, then the thief suddenly grabbed a gold chain off the neck of one of the store workers, a 59-year-old Bronx resident, and fled toward Third Avenue. The workers chased the perp and found the chain discarded on the sidewalk. The thief has not been caught.

BODEGA BRAWL
Two men got into a fight in a Second Avenue bodega on Saturday. A 37-year-old was talking with friends around the grocery store’s entrance before the altercation at about 12:45 a.m., and then was attacked by a 27-year-old, who punched him in the face multiple times. What caused the fight was not reported, but the attacker was arrested for assault shortly after the incident.

PHONE SWIPE
A young woman riding the M86 bus was busy with her iPhone around 10 p.m. on Monday when the device was suddenly snatched from her hand. Startled, she looked up and saw a teenage boy’s back as he ran off the bus at a stop. The victim, a 26-year-old who lives on East 88th Street, stored her driver’s license and credit cards in the phone’s case. Police were able to arrest the thief, a 15-year-old, later in the day.

MEAN CUSTOMER
A rowdy patron crossed the line last week when he punched a bar worker in the face. Prior to the attack, the worker, 56, asked the 18-year-old patron and his friends to leave the Third Avenue bar around 1:30 a.m. last Thursday, Nov. 22. The patron was apparently unhappy with this request, and lashed out at the worker, causing a laceration over the worker’s right eye. The worker reported the attack to police, and the patron was arrested for assault.

Photo courtesy of Samsung.

The Samsung Galaxy S III is just the thing to make Apple loyalists question the sanity in their devotion. Apple should do the same.

In 2007, when everyone was running around with RAZR flip phones in one hand and an iPod nano in the other, Apple gave us a sea change. Nobody who has ever bought movie tickets with Fandango, decided on dinner with Yelp, or wasted actual precious chunks of their lives playing brain-hole games like Angry Birds or Temple Run (e.g. me, sadly) can deny that the iPhone changed the way we interact with the world and with each other—by changing our understanding of how we could.

But, yo, people. That was five years ago. That thing caught everybody of guard. We were silly with it; remember? People paid $999.99 for I Am Rich, the arrow-pointing-up-I’m-With-Stupid-shirt for the new millennium. An app called iFart Mobile famously inhaled $10,000 dollars per day in 2008. iFart. iFART! Yes. We were silly, turns out it was all worth it, but we were super silly, y’all.

But now all that stuff that ooh’d and genuinely awed us is standard issue. So many people have smartphones that the New York Times actually thought it was news that a handful of contrarians choose not to join the fun. I wonder if they ran a similar article when that wacky Internet was all the rage. Remember that? I could Google it, but why bother?

What I’m trying to say is that unless the next iPhone is a G.D. spaceship, or transmogrifies the raw materials of the cosmos into Popeye’s famous popcorn shrimp, anything it brings to the table will likely be nothing new.

Will it have maps? Not Google Maps, which now runs offline on the SGS3, and all Android phones (lightning fast!). Will it have crazy good resolution? Likely. Retina? It would behoove them to do us the favor, but the SGS3 has an HD Super AMOLED (active-matrix organic light-emitting diode) screen which, at 4.8” feels a little bulky, but dang if that thing doesn’t look cleaner than Starbucks bathrooms in TriBeCa. Will it have Facebook? Instagram? Will it have…what? A camera? Will it have a phone?

It may be time to face the facts: the rest of the world may have caught up to the iPhone.

Now, I’ll say this, Samsung may have been being real smart and all, but they came super cocky with it. Not a good look, y’all. They seem to think that the coolest thing about the SGS3 is how easy it is to share pictures, music, or just any pseudo-tangible item made of up to 3GB worth of binary. Like, that is cool. Certainly. But it’s not easy. Not unless all your homies also have the SGS3, and even then it involves permissions and settings and really, nobody’s sweating that stuff when it’s already very easy to share electronic data without forcing friends to resent each other cause they had to buy the same phone (if you want to twist our skivvies, stick a USB on that doggie, dawg).

No. The coolest thing about the Samsung Galaxy S III isn’t htat it dims to save power when you look away from the screen, or that it’s got wild facial recognition capabilities, or that you can watch video on a pop-out player while multitasking. No. The coolest thing is TecTiles.

This: little squares about 1” x 1” or so that can be programed to activate whatever stuff on your phone. The example I keep seeing is that you can put one nightstand to activate your alarm just by placing your phone on the thing. But there’re tons of potential uses for these TecTile deals:

• Put one: on the door and tap to open your subway app;
• near the table and tap to open your morning news;
• on your amp and set your phone down to open your guitar tuner;
• bands should have one on the merch table so that fans can FB Like them
• businesses might have one on the counter for a quick 4^2 check in;
• put one on your wallet and tap your pocket to open your camera (HOT!)
• etc. etc.

So, whatever, is the Samsung Galaxy S III going to be an ‘iPhone Killer’? Maybe not, but not for lack of guns. This little buddy is about as good as they get. If you’re looking to buy a phone this summer, it’s a good time to go Samsung. The Galaxy S III has everything you need, and a whole lot of stuff you probably won’t even know what to do with.