Oh No Cuomo

There is nothing like commencement-day speakers to make one puke. Especially when it's Ivy League, as in Yale or Brown. The latter had Madeleine Albright: war criminal, Clinton caddy and as intimidating as Shirley Temple but only half her size. Yale was even better. For Class Day, it had Hillary Clinton: smiling wallet-lifter, lunchbucket pilferer, and as venal as her draft-dodging husband but half his weight. La Clinton was received with a standing ovation by the students and the faculty, which proves that, with a few exceptions like Bill Buckley and the Bushes, Yale's student body and faculty is comprised of viciously promiscuous, satyromaniacal perverts and catamites.

Some 208 faculty members signed a petition by one Bruce Ackerman protesting the honorary degree Yale awarded to George W. Banner-waving students also protested because they felt he didn't deserve it. Perhaps, but I do know what the protesters deserve, and that's a dose of the clap, the same their fathers had when they were conceived.

Hillary is so shameless, even I'm coming around to her. "Dare to compete," she told the cheering morons, as if she knew how to spell the word. Everything she's achieved since graduation has not been through honest competition but by riding the coattails of the priapic perjurer. Even her election as senator from Harlem, Queens, the Bronx and the Upper West Side of Manhattan was mainly achieved through name recognition and the fact that a brain-dead-through-too-much-television public perceived her as a victim.

She's a good actress, however, and politics, remember, is all about acting. Take, for example, Andrew Cuomo. If anyone is a Hillary clone, it's Andrew Kennedy Cuomo Lasagna Soprano. No one spent more tax dollars than Andrew Cuomo Kennedy Fagioli to further his own political ambitions, yet here he is calling for probes because of Gov. Pataki's frequent flying at taxpayers' expense. Pataki is wrong, but he had a great teacher in Mario Cuomo Linguini Soprano. Air Cuomo was invented by the hitman lookalike.

Andrew Cuomo Penne represents the worst of American politics: opportunism and total disdain for the voter. Andrew Kennedy Pizza had no qualms about yanking $60 million in federal aid to the Big Bagel as a slap in the face to Giuliani when the Mayor was running against Hillary. And he's not above a bit of larcenous behavior: when $500,000 dollars went missing from Housing Works funds, he shut his mouth tighter than a goodfella. Still, as soon as he saw an opportunity to enrich himself, he launched lawsuits against gun manufacturers. Gun dealers, according to Cuomo, should determine in advance who are the potential criminals before they make a living. (One thing is for sure: if I were a gun salesman the last person I'd sell a penknife to would be Papa Mario Zucchini.)

The American Spectator, one of the hottest magazines around, pointed out in 1994 that Andrew Kennedy Cuomo was an attorney and investor in a takeover of a Miami Beach bank, Ocean Mark Savings and Loan. The original owners charged that Cuomo and his gang sought an illegal change of control and tried to loot its assets. Also, that a Cuomo gang-member took out a razor and threatened the owner's family. This is nice and Soprano-like, but do we need such a person living in the governor's mansion up in Albany?

Cuomo last year alone spent thousands of taxpayer dollars making dozens of trips to the Big Bagel to arse-lick Jesse Jackson and meet with editorial boards. No other state got more than four visits, yet with a straight face Cuomo Kennedy Tagliatelle demands that Gov. Pataki reimburse the public.

Yes, sportsfans, it is as elementary as ABC: Anyone But Cuomo. And speaking of The American Spectator, a publication I've been contributing to for more than 20 years, how did you like that turkey-chinned toady Mark Shields calling the monthly toxic and lousy on CNN? Al Hunt, a fellow lowlifer and kneejerk caddy to Kennedys and Cuomos, agreed. It is the greatest compliment possible. Both Shields and Hunt have faces that could close a thousand multiplexes, and brains to match. With enemies such as Shields and Hunt, who needs Pulitzers?

The best of all, however, is Geraldo Rivera. He, too, has railed against The American Spectator for investigating Bonnie and Clyde Clinton, which is par for the course. Rivera is an apologist and propagandist, and wouldn't tell the truth if he witnessed Clinton raping a nun. An automatic Pulitzer for anyone attacked by Geraldo.

Mind you, there will be more of these grotesque media types as we go along. It all has to do with education and those who teach. The ancient Greeks in their infinite wisdom made sure the young were taught correctly or else. Marx quickly realized the way to change the world was through education. He did not propose public education for some children?he asked for the public education of all children. This was an obvious move. If the state provides the only education, it funnels whatever it wants to the young during their formative years.

The spoiled body-snatchers who booed and demonstrated against George W. Bush at Yale are posers, but have also had their brains washed by leftists. It is a curious thing. We in the West won the Cold War, defeated the most monstrous system devised by man, yet have to tolerate scum teachers ruining the young through their pseudo-Marxist rants. Next time I see a Yale professor I'll reach for my gun.