David Carr: From Crackhead to Potato Head
This morning on the subway I started reading The Night of the Gun, the gripping new drug memoir by New York Times reporter David Carr. Its filled with great, memorable lines. Almost right away, this sentence on page 22 stopped me cold:
Far from clinically handsome, I have a face that looks like it could have been carved out of mashed potatoes, and my idea of exercise was running the length of my body.
Nice imagery! Carr can totally turn a phrase. But it sounded familiar a face like potatoes. Where had I heard that line before? I felt certain Id read it somewhere else recently, and so I went online to investigate. Within seconds, Id found it: In a July 7, 2008 article in the New York Timesby David Carr!
In a column about how Fox News had been presenting distorted images of New York Times reporters, Carr contemplated how his own face might fall victim to the Fox Photoshopping menace:
.with a face made out of potatoes, the Photoshopped picture will have to go a long way to make me any uglier than I actually am.
But wait, theres more!
On June 16, 2008just two weeks before the Fox News piecethe phrase turned up in another David Carr column, when he described the late NBC News correspondent Tim Russert this way:
He had a face that seemed to be carved out of potatoes, but he worked on television by working harder than your average talking head
And three months before thatin the Times Talk to the Newsroom web feature that showcases interviews with New York Times reporters and editorsCarr answered a question about his television background with this now-familiar-sounding assessment of his looks:
With a face that looks as if it were crafted out of mashed potatoes and a voice that sounds like a trash compactor that needs oil, Im not a natural for television
Carrs compulsion to characterize human faces as spud-like isnt limited to himself and Russertwhose name, after all, might at least suggest such a comparison. Consider this description of debonair movie star Daniel Craig from Carrs Carpetbagger blog on the New York Times website, from November 16, 2006:
To the Baggers eye, [Craig] has a face made out of potatoesalthough the rest of him seems to be made out of titanium
To be fair, sometimes Carr takes the metaphor in unexpected directions. For example, in the March 23, 2006 edition of the Times, Carr had this to say about actor Steve Buscemis resemblance to his favorite starch:
Directors tend to focus on Mr. Buscemis visage, shooting his face so it looks something like what might happen to a bowl of mashed potatoes if it were sculptured [sic] by an ax.
But in the end, Carr comes back to his stock phrase and its studied simplicity, much the way the rest of us return, with regularity, to a favored meal of meat andlets saypotatoes. Consider this comforting reference to NYPD Blue actor Dennis Franz from a David Carr profile of the former Detective Sipowicz on March 1, 2005:
And Detective Sipowicz, with a face that looks as if it were carved out of potatoes and the body style of a greeter at Home Depot, was an unlikely hero.
Lest one think that Carr limits this literary device to men with lumpy faces or craggy complexions, its worth noting this citation from a Carr profile of the square-jawed, white-haired author Joe McGinniss, published on July 28, 2004:
[McGinniss] had an old cap set against the Sunday morning sun, a handsome Irish face that could have been carved out of potatoes, and a glint of tragedy in his eyes.
Or was it just a glint of butter and a side of sour cream?