PART HIT MAN, PART SPAMBOT A 50-year-old West End Avenue resident reported to police last Thursday that he received repeated e-mails from an unknown man threatening to kill him. In the messages, the perp explained that someone had offered him $2,000 (half given in advance) to execute the Upper West Sider, and that the resident could only subvert his pending demise by paying the perp $1,000. Concerned for his safety, the resident reported the threats to the FBI, who told him to go to local authorities. Police filed the case as attempted grand larceny. CELLPHONE SWIPE An unknown man stole an iPhone from an unsuspecting woman late last Thursday night at the corner of Amsterdam Avenue and West 80th Street. The thief snuck up behind the 28-year-old woman at the intersection, smacked her on the side of her head, then snatched her phone while she was stunned. The woman was unable to retrieve the phone's serial number from her wireless provider for tracking purposes, but police nevertheless reportedly recovered video of the man, a 6-foot-tall Caucasian in his mid-30s, attempting to sell the phone at a hostel on Amsterdam Avenue. The suspect is still at large. BACKDOOR ROBBERY An unidentified burglar stole money and electronics from a clothing store on Columbus Avenue last Friday by sneaking in through a basement back door. The thief managed to access to the basement's storeroom from an outside alley, then charged upstairs into the store when a young female employee opened the usually locked door to go downstairs. He locked the employee in the basement, then headed to the store's office, where he grabbed a safe, two iPhones and an iPad with a combined worth around $2,000. No security cameras were in place to pick up the thief's details, and he made a clean escape. KNIFE-WIELDING CROOK On Wednesday last week, an unidentified man burst into a chain store on Broadway between West 81st and 82nd streets and demanded the cash drawer. "Give me the money," he said, and withdrew a knife as two employees ran away. The robber snatched the bottom part of the register, which held an unknown amount of cash, then rushed out of the store. Video surveillance showed that he was Caucasian in his mid-40s, wearing glasses, jeans, a waist length jacket and brown dress shoes. HURRICANE HEIST In the middle of a hurricane, probably the absolute last thing you want to worry about is someone breaking in and stealing your stuff. But that's exactly what some rude New Yorker did to a local newsstand vendor, who returned to his kiosk on Broadway after the storm on Tuesday to find a broken lock on his front gate and thousands of dollars of merchandise missing. Gone were lottery tickets, phone cards and cigarette cartons along with $2,000 cash, together setting the salesman back over $10,000. KEY BETRAYAL The owner of a commercial building on Columbus Avenue got a sad surprise when he watched the surveillance video of a burglar robbing his store from the front door. In the early hours of Friday, Nov. 2, an unidentified man approached the store and used keys to unlock the main entrance and an interior security gate. Once inside, the perp put on rubber gloves and pried open the cash register with an unidentified sharp object. He then fled the scene, leaving the sharp object behind. He wore a brown hoodie that obstructed the camera's view of his face.