Best of Manhattan 2001 Readers’ Poll

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“You must now turn
up to the duel if you have a man’s heart rather than a mare’s. And
if anyone fails to turn up, then a scorn-pole will be raised against him with
this curse–that he will be a coward in the eyes of all men, and will never
again share the fellowship of good folk, and will endure the wrath of the gods,
and bear the name of a truce-breaker.”


With this their ways parted
and each headed back to his homestead. News of this spread through the region.
These duels were to take place at the same time as Thorstein was to hold a feast
at Hof, as he did every autumn.


There was a woman named
Helga; she came to Iceland with Berg and was his mistress. She was a large and
imposing woman, gifted with foresight and prophecy, and wise in witches’
ways.


She said to Berg, “Things
have turned out unhappily for you and your kinsmen in that you intend to try
your luck against the sons of Ingimund. It must not go this way, because Thorstein
is a proven man in both intelligence and luck, and it is rightly said of Jokul
that no berserk is his equal anywhere in the Northern Quarter, and you are no
match for him, powerful figure that you are; and whatever great disgrace you
have already suffered at his hands, you will endure twice as much if you have
any further dealings with him.”


Berg replied, “Jokul
has said so much that it has become intolerable for me.”


Helga replied, “Even
though you are so stupid that you cannot look after yourself, I will bring it
about that this duel never takes place.”


“Why shouldn’t
you have the last word?” said Berg.


Finnbogi knew nothing of
these plans.


And now, as to this year’s
Readers’ Poll. Best fries? McDonald’s. Best coffee? Starbucks. Best
political candidate? Mark Green. Best home furnishings? Crate & Barrel.
Best New York Press writer? Knipfel. Best weekly magazine? Time Out
New York
. Etc.


Thank you, genius who thought
the best reason to evict Bubba from Harlem was because “he scarfs all the
fried chicken.” Much obliged, the reader who noted of the renewed Harlem,
“Heah come the crackers.” Appreciate the tip, you esthetes who responded
to “Best Jazz Venue” with the news that “Jazz is dead” and
“Jazz is boring.” Tip of the hat to the Buchananites who responded,
“Fuck the French” to “Best French Bistro” and “Screw
Jamaica” to “Best Jamaican Restaurant.” Nice try, Universal Force
Yoga, but as we warned you, ballot-stuffing is frowned upon.


Let the scorn-pole be erected.




Media & Politics



Best Mayoral Candidate
Mark Green



Best Dumb Move by a Local
Political Candidate
Mike Bloomberg Running for Mayor


Best Weekly Magazine
Time Out New York


Best Silicon Alley Implosion
Pseudo


Best Aggravating Local
Campaign Commercial
Bloomberg


Best Side Effect of Rev
Al’s lncarceration (Besides Weight Loss)
More Food for the Rest of
Us


Best Times Columnist
William Safire


Best Reason to Avoid
New York Press
MUGGER


Best Tabloid New
York Post


Best Daily Newspaper
The New York Times


Best New York Press
Writer
Jim Knipfel


Best New York Times
Writer to Laugh At
Maureen Dowd


Best New York Press
Cartoonist
Tony Millionaire


Best Media Columnist
MUGGER


Best New York Post
Columnist to Avoid
All


Best Food Writer Andrey
Slivka


Best Magazine to Avoid
Talk


Best Sports Coverage
New York Post


Best Gossip Column
Michael Musto



Services



Best Newsstand Hudson
News



Best Bicycle Shop
Toga Bike Shop


Best Used Clothes
Salvation Army


Best Tobacconist
Nat Sherman


Best Home Furnishings
Crate & Barrel


Best Wine Shop Astor
Wines &Spirits


Best Florist 1-800-flowers.com


Best Butcher Citarella


Best Gourmet Store Balducci’s


Best Boutique Patricia
Field


Best Toy Store FAO
Schwarz


Best Outdoor Gear Paragon


Best Guitar Store 30th
Street Guitars


Best Children’s
Clothes
The Gap


Best Bookstore The
Strand


Best Pharmacy Duane
Reade


Best Hair Salon Bumble
and Bumble


Best Men’s Clothes
Barneys


Best Fishmonger Citarella


Best Makeup Counter
MAC


Best Pedicure Sally’s


Best Lingerie Victoria’s
Secret


Best Liquor Store
Astor Wines & Spirits


Best Pot Brand Name
All-Clad


Best Barber Astor
Place Hairstylists


Best Record Store Virgin


Best Spa Bliss


Best Gym Crunch



Manhattan Living



Best Up-and-Coming Neighborhood
Harlem



Best Neighborhood to
Avoid
Upper East Side


Best Subway Station
Astor Place


Best Subway Station to
Avoid
Times Square


Best Reason to Laugh
at Failed Dotcommers
Arrogance


Best Outdoor Makeout
Spot
Central Park


Best Sports Announcer
Marv Albert


Best New York Athlete
Derek Jeter


Best Reason to Evict
Bubba from Harlem
None


Best Museum Metropolitan
Museum of Art


Best Neighborhood Chelsea


Best Local Celebrity
Ed Koch


Best Local Celeb Who
Is Not Lizzie Grubman
Monica Lewinsky


Best Reason to Leave
New York
High Rent


Best Reason to Stay in
New York
Art & Culture


Best Drug Ecstasy


Best Trend to Laugh At
Big Baggy Pants on Guys


Best Reason to Outlaw
Cellphones
Cancer



Eats &
Drinks



Best Manhattan Bar Old
Town



Best Restaurant to Break
Up In
McDonald’s


Best Bar Jukebox West
Side Tavern


Best Coffee Bar Starbucks


Best Steakhouse Peter
Luger


Best Williamsburg Bar
The Abbey


Best Rice & Beans
Manhattan Hero


Best Hetero Pick-Up Scene
O’Flaherty’s


Best Gay Pick-Up Scene
Splash


Best Wine Bar Simone


Best Diner Empire
Diner


Best Late-Night Restaurant
Florent


Best Soul Food Sylvia’s


Best Seafood Restaurant
Aquagrill


Best Roast Chicken
Red Cat


Best Breakfast Big
Nick’s


Best Vegetarian Restaurant
Zen Palate


Best Ice Cream Ben
& Jerry’s


Best Solo Dining Empire
Diner


Best Mexican Restaurant
Mexican Radio


Best French Bistro Pastis


Best Slice of Pizza Two
Boots


Best Pizza Patsy’s


Best Cocktail Bar King
Cole at St. Regis Hotel


Best French Fries McDonald’s


Best Kids’ Restaurant
McDonald’s


Best Brunch 18th
& 8th


Best Jamaican Restaurant
Golden Crust


Best Irish Bar McFadden’s


Best Food Trend Bottled
Water


Best Indian Restaurant
Rupali


Best Dumplings Peking
Duck House


Best First-Date Restaurant
Knickerbocker Bar & Grill


Best Outdoor Dining Le
Jardin Bistro


Best Sushi Monster
Sushi


Best Italian Ices Gino’s
Italian Ices


Best Margarita Mexican
Radio


Best Greek Food Uncle
Nick’s


Best Brooklyn Restaurant
Oznot’s Dish


Best Bakery Veniero’s


Best Chinese Food VP
2


Best Restaurant for a
Party
Blue Ribbon Bakery


Best New Restaurant The
Pod


Best Italian Restaurant
Babbo



Entertainment



Best Movie Theater Ziegfeld



Best Local Cable Access
Show
Robin Byrd


Best Local Band The
Lounge-O-Leers


Best Overhyped Local
Band
The Strokes


Best Club Night Saturday


Best Rock Club CBGB’s


Best Jazz Venue Village
Vanguard


Best Outdoor Concert
in 2001
NY Philharmonic in Central Park


Best Art Gallery Metropolitan
Museum of Art


Best College Radio Station
WFUV


Best Theater Performance
Nathan Lane, The Producers


Best DJ Junior Vasquez


Best Performance Art
Venue
P.S. 122


Best Local Radio Talk-Show
Host
Howard Stern


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