
Is there a line outside your window in Midtown yet? Yeah, those would
be the hordes of people possessed to wait for 48 hours to buy a sofa
whose name they can’t pronounce. The grand opening of
IKEA in Brooklyn
is nigh, so anyone looking to justify their $3,000-a-month studio
apartment rent with the purchase of a coffee table that’s a downright
steal, drop everything and make way for
Red Hook immediately!
Brooklyn-dwellers forced to make room for that burns-the-retina combination of blue and yellow on their skyline have been
less than enthused about the store
for quite some time now, despite claims from the folks at IKEA that the
new location will provide jobs for Red Hookers (pardon the moniker) and
mend the neighborhood’s
racial divide.
Chiefly among many people’s concerns is the effect the new store will
have on already slow-moving traffic in the area. (I myself am not much
looking forward to sharing a subway car with the Tylösand chaise
lounge.) But buck up, ye who dare to clog the city with your
assembly-not-included happiness and piss off an entire outer borough!
IKEA wants to reward you for coming out early with goodies galore:
The first 35 adults in line on June 18 will receive a free Ektorp sofa,
a $399 value. After that, the next 100 adults will receive a Poäng
chair, an $89 value. The first 100 children in line will receive...
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