Home » Articles » Film » Films Features »  Better-Than List 2008
Wednesday, January 7,2009

Better-Than List 2008

Jason Statham trounces Chris Nolan’s caped crusader and more surprises in ARMOND WHITE’s annual reassessment of the year’s top films.

By Armond White
. . . . . . .
IT ALWAYS COMES down to this: Movies you must experience versus movies that threaten to diminish you. That’s the point of making a Better-Than List rather than pretending that the typical over-hyped product constitutes a consensus of worthwhile movies. Most of these high-profile films insult one’s intelligence, while the year’s best movies vanish from the marketplace for lack of critical support. This tragedy is exemplified by the scary acclaim for the year’s worst: The atrocious Slumdog Millionaire and Pixar’s hideous Wall-E, the buzz-kill movie of all time. Trust no critic who endorses them.

Happy Go Lucky BETTER THAN 4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days Mike Leigh devises a thoroughly humane heroine (Sally Hawkins) whose anti-capitalist faith (deeper than bourgeois “feminism”) upbraids the pity-party of two abortionhorny Romanian co-eds.

The Witnesses, Jump the Broom BETTER THAN Milk Andre Téchiné’s AIDS history joined Ian-Patrik Polk’s gay-marriage rom-com to show how sexual politics enhance our lives. These films rendered silly the hindsight celebration of an ambitious pol—and the Prop. 8 protests that misread Gus Van Sant’s opportunism.

Rachel Getting Married BETTER THAN Frozen River Jonathan Demme rehearses multi-culti heaven rather than condescend to hard-luck working-class women.

Transporter 3 BETTER THAN The Dark Knight Olivier Megaton, Jason Statham and Luc Besson reinvent the action movie as kinetic art, but impressionable teenagers mistook Chris Nolan’s nihilistic graphic novel for kool fun.

CJ7 BETTER THAN Wall-E

Stephen Chow endowed a poor kid’s action figure with numinous potential (a tribute to the still-extraordinary E.T.), while Pixar twisted its standard formula into ugly, end-ofhistory cynicism.

Shotgun Stories BETTER THAN The Wrestler Jeff Nichols’ moving Red State family feud tragedy was ignored by Blue State critics who prefer white-trash WWF stereotypes to encourage their sense of class superiority.

My Blueberry Nights BETTER THAN The Curious Case of Benjamin Button Wong Kar Wai’s visionary romanticism explores existential loneliness, but David Fincher merely remade Titanic as Forrest Gump—an endless, two-hankie Kubrick movie for fanboys.

RocknRolla BETTER THAN Slumdog Millionaire Guy Ritchie comes into his manhood with this rich, Dickensian gangster comedy, while Danny Boyle gives colonialist Britain the last laugh in his epic Indian game-show travesty—a defilement of what Dickens revealed about character and society, humor and pathos.

Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull BETTER THAN Iron Man Steven Spielberg’s par excellence genre expertise wrung fresh amazement out of the Indy Jones franchise; it exposed Iron Man’s dung-like banality.

Gunnin’ For That #1 Spot BETTER THAN Man on Wire Adam Yauch brings fresh imagination to this Rucker Park bball documentary, extolling youth, class and American splendor; the other commemorates an egotistical stunt.

Twilight BETTER THAN Let the Right One In Catherine Hardwicke finds her métier in an outsiders’ romance disguised as a vampire movie; she turns Stephenie Meyer’s book series into a Brontė-esque vision, especially compared to the dismal Scandinavian J-horror rip-off.

Cadillac Records BETTER THAN Synecdoche, New York Darnell Martin treats Black American history as R&B and her sizzling cast (Jeffrey Wright, Beyoncé, Eamonn Walker, Columbus Short, Mos Def, Cedric the Entertainer) salutes pop music legends. Charlie Kaufman’s Actors Studio cast merely imitated Fellini’s 8 1/2 like amateurs.

Chaos Theory BETTER THAN Flight of the Red Balloon Marcos Siega, screenwriter Daniel Taplitz and Ryan Reynolds found beauty in American sex farce, but Hou Hsiao Hsien shortchanged Gallic romanticism into high-brow desolation.

My Winnipeg BETTER THAN Paranoid Park Guy Maddin reinvented his sexual autobiography as a funny, touching sociological history, outclassing Gus Van Sant’s morbid celebration of Northwestern pedophilia.

The Romance of Astrea and Celadon BETTER THAN A Christmas Tale Eric Rohmer, a forgotten master, revives classical lit for an exquisite satire of modern sexual mores (where did he find such beautiful human icons?). But it was Desplechin’s sac c har i ne French-family sob story that got the national release.

Battle for Haditha BETTER THAN Frost/Nixon Nick Broomfield’s inspired treatment of the Iraq War shamed Ron Howard’s revenge-drama, the latest yawn of liberal self selfrighteousness.

  • Currently 3.5/5 Stars.
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Posted at 10/19/2009 
 
Interested in the NEW book by Armond White? It's called, "KEEP MOVING: The Michael Jackson Chronicles" and it's a collection of essays on the subject of King Of Pop, MICHAEL JACKSON. Written over the course of 25 years, the essays focus on the songs and music videos AFTER the Thriller album. If you are interested in more information, google the title OR visit the blog www.resistanceworks.blogspot.com

 

Posted at 02/21/2009 
 
I almost want to like this guy because he hates everyone almost as much as I do. But he used Dickensian and Bronte-esque to describe a Guy Ritchie film and Twilight. Really? Congrats on the purchase of your Roget's thesaurus. These reviews are idiotic.. The Dark Knight was nihilistic? The Joker was nihilistic, but the good characters aren't. If the people on the boats had blown each other up, that might have been nihilistic. But that didn't happen. This guy sucks. As such, he will probably become one of the most well respected crtiics in the game.

 

Posted at 01/19/2009 
 
"Abortionhorny"? That's offensive, right? Like... how is that not offensive? I haven't seen Happy-Go-Lucky, but HAVE seen the abortionhorny Romanian drama, and well, it was one of my favorites of 2007. Sad or not, it's great. "Transporter 3 BETTER THAN The Dark Knight" because of "Knight"'s nihilistic attitude? What? Not only is "The Dark Knight" not nihilistic, upholding all sorts of good American ideals, "Transporter 3" is nihilistic. It doesn't believe in anything, Lebowski. It's just a action-packed action pack. White is really starting to dig under my skin. Although I do like his comparison of "Slumdog Millionaire" to Dickens, I despise the man for saying that godawful looking Guy Ritchie film is on the same level as, let alone better than, "Slumdog". I'm almost positive by this point that if a film has a shred of human emotion in it, he decides to find something to repress his own. "Kingdom of the Crystal Skull" over "Iron Man". I didn't see "Iron Man", but I did see a midnight screening of "Crystal Skull". It's a laughable parody of "Raiders of the Lost Ark", filmed through what appears to be a filter of smog, and with a story that I could have written when I was dead. "Man on a Wire" is the best documentary I've ever seen about a man trying to tight-rope walk between the World Trade Centers. And believe you me, I've seen quite a few in my day. Okay, "Let the Right One In" is a "J-Horror rip off"?! Do any of you see a blue little boy meowing, or crawling out of a well? No. You see a sweet, 200 year old girl becoming friends with a little blonde outcast. Little-y. One of my favorite movies of the year said to be worse than "Twilight"? "Twilight"!? This man... no, this swine, is one of the worst people I've ever read. "Synecdoche, New York" was the best film of 2008. He couldn't even find a film worth comparing it to. "Cadillac Records" has a nice hard Brody in it, which I don't mind, but when it's sharing ground with "Synecdoche", I demand bloodshed. Two Gus Van Sant bashes in one list? Not hard to understand, noticing this about the last sentence: "the latest yawn of liberal self selfrighteousness." Armond White is more than an utter travesty. He is an utter travesty OF an utter travesty. Eh? Clever, right? Ugh. This man sucks.

 

Posted at 01/10/2009 
 
Armond I would really love to read your review of WALL-e

 

Posted at 01/09/2009 
 
Armond: I've been reading your work religiously for several years, and even though I don't always agree with you, I appreciate your fiercely non-conformist approach to film viewing/criticism. I agree with many of your choices, but I HAVE to take issue with your trouncing of Wall-E. Intelligent family films are increasingly hard to come by, and though I see where you might mistake the film's plea for personal responsibility as cynicism, I fail to comprehend how you can so flippantly dismiss the sincerity of its point and the hope it ultimately finds in humanity. Do you disagree that overconsumption in every form, as well as an increased reliance on technology, is crushing the human spirit? Are we not ruining our planet, our relationships and our minds and bodies with the garbage that we take in and discard on a minute-by-minute basis? And doesn't the film ultimately acknowledge the resilience of humanity? I myself cannot find a more uplifting, optimistic and moral film this year... It just seems so pertinent to the life that we all live... It's also gorgeous... Not to mention the fact that it's age-appropriate without pandering. I REALLY wish you would write an actual review of the film. Please, please explain if you feel so inclined. Hell, email me. As an aspiring film critic, you're one of my heroes. I need more!

 

 
 


  • Sun
    14
  • Mon
    15
  • Tue
    16
  • Wed
    17
  • Thu
    18
  • Fri
    19
  • Sat
    20

Search in Events

Sign up for the NYPress
e-newsletter for weekly updates
and exciting event info:





Join us on Facebook Follow Us
on Twitter







 User Profile (click to open)



New_York_300_60.gif

 
 
Close
Close