A-Rod Opts Out

Written by Jason Singer on . Posted in Posts, Sports.


The New York Yankees are such an undesirable destination these days that they can’t even give their money away anymore. Ten days after Joe Torre turned down at least $5 million from The Pinstripers, Alex Rodriguez opted out of his contract, walking away from the remaining three years and $72 million left on his deal plus the five years and $150 million the Yankees were willing to offer him in an extension. Apparently, A-Rod and agent Scott Boras think they can get more than that on the open market. Apparently, A-Rod and Boras are idiots.

In a telephone interview Sunday night, Boras said A-Rod chose to opt out because of the Yankees’ uncertain future. “Alex’s decision was one based on not knowing what his closer, his catcher and one of his statured pitchers was going to do,” he said. “He really didn’t want to make any decisions until he knew what they were doing.” Of course, we all know that’s bullshit. A-Rod has wanted to escape Gotham ever since he set foot in this town, because he suffers from a disease known as “severe larynx tightening” that only surfaces every time the playoffs roll around. The cure for such an affliction? Join a small-market team, where no one’s watching and no pressure exists.

The Yankees have emphatically stated that they won’t negotiate with A-Fraud if he opts out of his contract, that his price tag would be too great. Well that’s perfect for Rodriguez, who doesn’t want anything to do with New York. The next question is though, who will take the Yankees money now that A-Rod isn’t using it? It doesn’t seem like anyone wants to be part of a team that’s lost the ALDS, their class, their manager and now their best player all in a three-week span. Did I mention their archrivals won the World Series last night?

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