THERE’S STILL A LITTLE ROOM ON OUR ASS

THERE ARE ADS on the sides of buildings and buses, plastering the walls in subway stations and lining the subway cars themselves. There are ads in public bathrooms, on clothing, on the tops of cabs, wheatpasted around construction sites, and on the floors of supermarkets.

There's nothing groundbreaking in pointing out that we're inundated with ads wherever we go in this city. It's a fact of life in New York in the Age of the All-Mighty Sponsor that's at once annoying for us, and troubling for city officials. It's not troubling because it's an assault on the mayor's beloved "quality of life." It's troubling because the city's running out of places to stick ads.

The latest plan suggests placing ad-sporting discs on the hubcaps of taxicabs. You know, the ones that spin around real fast.

We think that's a fine idea. Unlike most of the ads we encounter every day, these will be positioned low enough to the ground to allow us to piss on them with ease.

One thing slowing down the implementation of the plan, however, is the fact that the city and the TLC have yet to decide how to spend the ad revenue. We've got an idea: Why don't they use that money to finance a study to help determine what dwindling bits of untainted space left in the city should next be sold off as ad space?